Midlife MavericksIt happened on a Tuesday night.
I was alone with my children.
Chest pain. Back pain. Shoulder pain. Right arm refusing to cooperate.
Every time I tried to turn in bed, the kind of pain that makes you forget to breathe.
And because I’m a woman, a mother, and, let’s be honest, a chronic minimiser of my own needs, I did what we all do:
I tried to go to sleep.
That lasted about four minutes.
I glanced at my daughter sleeping next to me. And something in my brain snapped out of denial and straight into clarity:
If something happens overnight… she’ll be the one to find me.
So I grabbed my phone with the only hand that still worked.
I typed my symptoms into NHS online.
Every single one flashed the same message:
“Call 111. Possible heart attack.”
My son asleep. My daughter – bless her – alert and terrified but somehow already stepping into action.
I made the call.
After a lifetime of being called dramatic, I thought they’d tell me to take a paracetamol and stop panicking. But no.
They sent an ambulance. Immediately.
I ended up on the floor of my bedroom unable to move much.
And I realised I had to call on my “village” to come to the rescue just in case.
My daughter opened the door to the paramedics like she’d trained for it her whole life.
They hooked me up, checked everything, and said the line that still echoes:
“You’re not having a heart attack… but you have all the signs of a pulmonary embolism. We’re taking you in now. Do you have anyone who can stay with the children?”
I smiled.
I had prepared, and my friend was en route.
I don’t remember putting on shoes.
I was so embarrassed about calling 111, but the paramedic told me off — lovingly — for not calling the day before.
And that’s how I ended up in the back of an ambulance, wearing pyjamas, hair like a crime scene, kids asleep at home, a school dad friend standing guard over my house, my cats, and my children, and my life paused mid-sentence.
So here’s what I want you to know.
Quote of the Week
“When you know your priorities, decisions become clear.”
Angela Duckworth
The hidden cost of being a high-functioning woman
Women, especially women under 55, are up to 59% more likely to be misdiagnosed during a heart attack than men. We’re more likely to be sent home while actually having an MI. We’re regularly told our symptoms are “anxiety,” “stress,” “indigestion,” or “muscle pain.”
And we’re more hesitant to call for help because we don’t want to “bother” anyone.
This is evidence across multiple registries, clinical reviews, and emergency department studies.
We are conditioned to push through pain, not make a fuss, be “resilient,” finish the bedtime routine even while dying.
It’s socialised self-abandonment.
And it’s costing women their lives.
Women’s heart attack symptoms are more likely to be dismissed — by them AND by clinicians. No wonder so many women die from heart disease despite equal or lower risk profiles.
The health-first framework
Stop minimising your symptoms
If it feels wrong, it is wrong. Pain that radiates, tightens, or restricts movement is a red flag.
Memorise the signs — and teach your kids
Chest pressure or pain. Back pain. Shoulder or jaw pain. Arm weakness. Shortness of breath. Nausea. Dizziness. Extreme fatigue. I had all of these symptoms. Anything that feels “new and bad.”
Call early, not late
Women often wait hours longer than men before seeking help. The paramedics told me I should’ve called the day before.
Ignore the embarrassment
Embarrassment nearly kept me in bed on Tuesday. Embarrassment is a terrible doctor.
Prioritise health like your business depends on it
Because it does. None of your dreams — not the consulting pivot, the portfolio career, not the premium clients, not the 20-hour week — matter if your body taps out.
I have a couple of topics lined up to write about but I thought to myself, 2,000 of you are reading this. And I have a duty towards you. If I can use my platform to get you to pay attention to your health, then I’ve achieved something GOOD.
This week’s action plan:
- Save this email in your “Emergency Notes” folder
- Teach someone in your house the signs of a heart attack in women
- Block 2 preventive appointments you’ve been avoiding (dentist, GP, bloods, mammogram, anything)
- Tell one friend this story and ask her to take her symptoms seriously
- Put “health first” somewhere visible in your home or laptop
A friend of mine – a man, yes, but the lesson applies to all of us – dropped dead last year at 44 from a heart attack whilst riding a bike. He had chest pain for a while before. What a waste of a beautiful life.
If this shook you, good. It should.
You cannot build a business if you’re not alive to run it.
You cannot lead clients if you can’t lift your right arm.
You cannot create time freedom if you’re spending the night in A&E scared you won’t come home.
Your health is your wealth. Everything else is a bonus.
And if you are ready to build the business – on a foundation of a healthy, alive, functioning you?
I’ll help you build a business that doesn’t require burning your body to the ground.
See you Wednesday.
